Post by Deleted on Dec 22, 2016 17:03:18 GMT
Somewhere in the Fedderverse, a space shuttle is flying.
It is huge, vast, and older than fuck compared to the Spring Chicken models flown by the Mutant Chickenmen or the Red Tiger models from the legendary Space Canadian Army. But considering it was the result of a trade with a mute cyborg pilot who killed most of her shipmates, it was double the worth of the TARDIS they had given up. And inside this shuttle, Anna Mathews, winner of many things no one else cares about and holder of the Estrel Medal, is undergoing rigorous training in the dark. She strike the air with a fluid grace. Only the light of distant stars separate shadows from body.
"Hey Anna! It’s ready!”
The Time Lord looks up just as a light switch is flipped revealing PuppetLiza lying on a cloud of magic. Anna smirks.
"Aye’m jus about done. Wut’s cookin’?"
"Special. Bell peppers and beef."
With silver chopsticks at the ready, the Time Lord's concentration is squarely on her food. The Puppet's is focused on the screen which brings up the criminal database. With an effortless swoop, the focus is set on one profile in particular.
"Angel Kash. She’s our next target.”
Anna stares at her plate. “Uh…listen, PuppetLiza.”
“This woman’s a major annoyance in the Fedderverse, operating mainly in Guerreros Of Lucha and CWF.”
“Jew said bell peppers an beef.”
“Her name’s Angel Kash. Are you listening to me?”
“Dere’s no beef inn hear. So ya really would’nt kall it bell peppers und beef, nao would you?”
“Yes, I would.” PuppetLiza replies, exasperated.
“Well, itt’s nawt!” Cue all the arm flailing.
“It is when you run out of groceries, okay?!”
“What happened tu dat fuk tonna food wii got from tha last place?”
“Had to feed those homeless from that building we wrecked. And that idiot who collided with the escape pod. And we had to pay the medical bill for that one guy’s balls!” The stuffed magician sighs. “Now listen. A short time ago, there was a battle between her, some girl named Ursula and a superhero chick. She roared it was her time, got pinned, and ran like the wind out of Mexico. Word is she’s hiding out in the Hamptons.”
“Tha Hamptons? Tat plase ish four cunts.”
“Yeah, well, this cunt is worth trillions of dollars.”
Anna swallows. “Yif dat’s tha case, why ish shee in tha wrestling business again?”
A beat.
“You know, I don’t have the foggiest.”
“Exactlee. Another generic, boaring rich bitch inn tha ‘Verse. Hurr crimes include being stupid, sportin a ego shee can’t bak hup, and rarely using punktuation. She's gonna "wha wha wha' about shit I've outklassed hurr in years ago. She's gunna spends most ov her tyme talking abowt how ev'ryone shuld bow to hur onlee ta lose near record time. Again.
Itt's sad dat I keep repeating myshelf. But tha trooth needs reapating. She's an overused gimmick. Eye'm savvy enuff ta no dat. And dis medal stais wit mii."
It is huge, vast, and older than fuck compared to the Spring Chicken models flown by the Mutant Chickenmen or the Red Tiger models from the legendary Space Canadian Army. But considering it was the result of a trade with a mute cyborg pilot who killed most of her shipmates, it was double the worth of the TARDIS they had given up. And inside this shuttle, Anna Mathews, winner of many things no one else cares about and holder of the Estrel Medal, is undergoing rigorous training in the dark. She strike the air with a fluid grace. Only the light of distant stars separate shadows from body.
"Hey Anna! It’s ready!”
The Time Lord looks up just as a light switch is flipped revealing PuppetLiza lying on a cloud of magic. Anna smirks.
"Aye’m jus about done. Wut’s cookin’?"
"Special. Bell peppers and beef."
With silver chopsticks at the ready, the Time Lord's concentration is squarely on her food. The Puppet's is focused on the screen which brings up the criminal database. With an effortless swoop, the focus is set on one profile in particular.
"Angel Kash. She’s our next target.”
Anna stares at her plate. “Uh…listen, PuppetLiza.”
“This woman’s a major annoyance in the Fedderverse, operating mainly in Guerreros Of Lucha and CWF.”
“Jew said bell peppers an beef.”
“Her name’s Angel Kash. Are you listening to me?”
“Dere’s no beef inn hear. So ya really would’nt kall it bell peppers und beef, nao would you?”
“Yes, I would.” PuppetLiza replies, exasperated.
“Well, itt’s nawt!” Cue all the arm flailing.
“It is when you run out of groceries, okay?!”
“What happened tu dat fuk tonna food wii got from tha last place?”
“Had to feed those homeless from that building we wrecked. And that idiot who collided with the escape pod. And we had to pay the medical bill for that one guy’s balls!” The stuffed magician sighs. “Now listen. A short time ago, there was a battle between her, some girl named Ursula and a superhero chick. She roared it was her time, got pinned, and ran like the wind out of Mexico. Word is she’s hiding out in the Hamptons.”
“Tha Hamptons? Tat plase ish four cunts.”
“Yeah, well, this cunt is worth trillions of dollars.”
Anna swallows. “Yif dat’s tha case, why ish shee in tha wrestling business again?”
A beat.
“You know, I don’t have the foggiest.”
“Exactlee. Another generic, boaring rich bitch inn tha ‘Verse. Hurr crimes include being stupid, sportin a ego shee can’t bak hup, and rarely using punktuation. She's gonna "wha wha wha' about shit I've outklassed hurr in years ago. She's gunna spends most ov her tyme talking abowt how ev'ryone shuld bow to hur onlee ta lose near record time. Again.
Itt's sad dat I keep repeating myshelf. But tha trooth needs reapating. She's an overused gimmick. Eye'm savvy enuff ta no dat. And dis medal stais wit mii."