Post by True North Ant on May 2, 2016 17:08:13 GMT
True North Ant stands in front of the Pollomania banner and begins speaking.
“So people want to know, ‘TNA, why did you turn on your partner, Philly Cheese Snake?’ The answer is simple; I was tired of carrying his pathetic ass and him getting all the damn glory. I was the star of that team, not him! I should have gotten that first shot at Ursula Areano for the Estrel Medal, not him! And speaking of titles, do you know why Strange Brew wasn’t in the Tag Grand Prix for the Twin Egg Championships? It’s because that stupid snake lost our application and we didn’t get it in before the deadline.
“Everything bad that happened to our team here in Pollomania has been his fault: not being in the Grand Prix, missing several shows this year, getting our asses handed to us by the Canadian Embassy Misfits twice, even losing out on becoming the first ever Estrel Medal winner. So when that moron tried to eliminate in the Rotisserie Rumble I had enough. That selfish prick knew he was going to retire that night; he should have helped me win, instead of trying to go out in a blaze of glory. So I crippled him. Instead of him getting to walk out on his own two feet, I made sure he was carried out on a stretcher. He’s lucky to have gotten off that easy, if that idiot, Marco Casas, hadn’t stuck his nose where it didn’t belong, it would have gone a lot worse for him!
“So, as far as I’m concerned, I’m done with tag team wrestling. It’s time to worry about only one person, and that’s me. What does Pollomania’s match makers so though? They book me in a trios match alongside that goofball Jacob Hammerstein and Keith Skyfire. The only consolation is that our opponents are Starship Madness and Casas. You know what though, that’s fine by me.
“Casas, I’m going to make you pay for sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong! You walked around here pretending to be a dead man for months. Well, when I’m done with you, I’m going to bury you six feet under, then prove to the world how good I am by beating one of tag team champions.
“Skyfire, Hammerstein, stay out of my way and don’t mess up, or you’ll end up like my former partner; heading off to the retirement home for wrestlers, long before your time!”
“Excuse me,” Angus Stewart of the Canadian Embassy walks into view of the camera, “Sorry to interrupt, Mr. Ant, but I was wondering if you’re prepared now to meet with the ambassador now? Like I said before, he’s a big fan of yours and would love to treat you to lunch and make you a proposal.”
True North Ant looks at him for a moment before he finally speaks, “You know what? I’ll take you up on that offer.”
The two shake hands and leave together.
“So people want to know, ‘TNA, why did you turn on your partner, Philly Cheese Snake?’ The answer is simple; I was tired of carrying his pathetic ass and him getting all the damn glory. I was the star of that team, not him! I should have gotten that first shot at Ursula Areano for the Estrel Medal, not him! And speaking of titles, do you know why Strange Brew wasn’t in the Tag Grand Prix for the Twin Egg Championships? It’s because that stupid snake lost our application and we didn’t get it in before the deadline.
“Everything bad that happened to our team here in Pollomania has been his fault: not being in the Grand Prix, missing several shows this year, getting our asses handed to us by the Canadian Embassy Misfits twice, even losing out on becoming the first ever Estrel Medal winner. So when that moron tried to eliminate in the Rotisserie Rumble I had enough. That selfish prick knew he was going to retire that night; he should have helped me win, instead of trying to go out in a blaze of glory. So I crippled him. Instead of him getting to walk out on his own two feet, I made sure he was carried out on a stretcher. He’s lucky to have gotten off that easy, if that idiot, Marco Casas, hadn’t stuck his nose where it didn’t belong, it would have gone a lot worse for him!
“So, as far as I’m concerned, I’m done with tag team wrestling. It’s time to worry about only one person, and that’s me. What does Pollomania’s match makers so though? They book me in a trios match alongside that goofball Jacob Hammerstein and Keith Skyfire. The only consolation is that our opponents are Starship Madness and Casas. You know what though, that’s fine by me.
“Casas, I’m going to make you pay for sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong! You walked around here pretending to be a dead man for months. Well, when I’m done with you, I’m going to bury you six feet under, then prove to the world how good I am by beating one of tag team champions.
“Skyfire, Hammerstein, stay out of my way and don’t mess up, or you’ll end up like my former partner; heading off to the retirement home for wrestlers, long before your time!”
“Excuse me,” Angus Stewart of the Canadian Embassy walks into view of the camera, “Sorry to interrupt, Mr. Ant, but I was wondering if you’re prepared now to meet with the ambassador now? Like I said before, he’s a big fan of yours and would love to treat you to lunch and make you a proposal.”
True North Ant looks at him for a moment before he finally speaks, “You know what? I’ll take you up on that offer.”
The two shake hands and leave together.