Post by Deleted on Apr 20, 2016 8:28:37 GMT
A death row inmate savors his last meal: Chicken strips with a side of mac 'n' cheese, courtesy of Pollo Bucket. Some say he doesn't deserve zesty flavor after the atrocities he committed, but unlike God, Pollo Bucket doesn't judge.
The commercial fades out and back into the darkened corridors of Minneapolis, Minnesota's own Pollo Hall. The camera appears to be resting on the ground, as it focuses on La Cucaracha sitting Indian style, as she reclines against a stand labeled, "Lost and Found." Her elbows rest on her knees, as her chin rests upon her upturned hands.
La Cucaracha: Since Dr. Scream didn't get a chance to make an official announcement after the Rotisserie Rumble, I'm going to assume this is all one big misunderstanding and that any minute now, Wiland is going to drop my Golden Egg Championship off at this lost and found booth. Yep. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaany minute now.
If not, I guess I can get it from him at Pollo Estrel. I just assumed it would be dropped off here. I mean, if you find something that doesn't belong to you, you either:
A)Take it to the nearest Lost and Found
B)Immediately sell it for cash, because cash is untraceable
You better believe I'm watching eBay, Wiland. If that belt shows up for auction, your account is getting flagged. Don't think you can Paypal your way outta this one.
But hey, we're gonna wrestle again. Two more times, even. This is technically my first tag match as professional wrestler, but I'm fully confident Ursula Areano is gonna bring it and we're going to be the greatest tag team ever. If we're not, we'll probably split after this and never team up again. Then I'll have to cut a deal with Zargnax, so he can science me up a replacement partner. If alternate dimensions are full of unfathomable beings that somehow know how to deliver a picture perfect side-suplex, then who am I to question the great mysteries of the universe? Just kidnap me a tentacle monster for a partner. And I mean a Lovecraftian tentacle monster, not a Japanese tentacle monster. After a little research, I've learned that those two sub-species have some key differences.
Beyond that, I just need to get my belt back. The glue on the cardboard one didn't hold and the goddamn trash can lid wouldn't stay in place. Sure enough, Ashcan Pete still challenged me for it down at the rail yard, but I threw some hot beans in his face and then hopped the 2-25 to Kansas City. Okay, maybe that stuff didn't happen and I've just been hanging out by this Lost and Found kiosk for a while sipping some coffee I swiped from our ring crew. Either way, I'm proud to represent this company as the Golden Egg Champion.
Cut back to the inmate, strapped into an electric chair. He looks lovingly to the chicken strip in his right hand, before the switch is thrown.
The commercial fades out and back into the darkened corridors of Minneapolis, Minnesota's own Pollo Hall. The camera appears to be resting on the ground, as it focuses on La Cucaracha sitting Indian style, as she reclines against a stand labeled, "Lost and Found." Her elbows rest on her knees, as her chin rests upon her upturned hands.
La Cucaracha: Since Dr. Scream didn't get a chance to make an official announcement after the Rotisserie Rumble, I'm going to assume this is all one big misunderstanding and that any minute now, Wiland is going to drop my Golden Egg Championship off at this lost and found booth. Yep. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaany minute now.
If not, I guess I can get it from him at Pollo Estrel. I just assumed it would be dropped off here. I mean, if you find something that doesn't belong to you, you either:
A)Take it to the nearest Lost and Found
B)Immediately sell it for cash, because cash is untraceable
You better believe I'm watching eBay, Wiland. If that belt shows up for auction, your account is getting flagged. Don't think you can Paypal your way outta this one.
But hey, we're gonna wrestle again. Two more times, even. This is technically my first tag match as professional wrestler, but I'm fully confident Ursula Areano is gonna bring it and we're going to be the greatest tag team ever. If we're not, we'll probably split after this and never team up again. Then I'll have to cut a deal with Zargnax, so he can science me up a replacement partner. If alternate dimensions are full of unfathomable beings that somehow know how to deliver a picture perfect side-suplex, then who am I to question the great mysteries of the universe? Just kidnap me a tentacle monster for a partner. And I mean a Lovecraftian tentacle monster, not a Japanese tentacle monster. After a little research, I've learned that those two sub-species have some key differences.
Beyond that, I just need to get my belt back. The glue on the cardboard one didn't hold and the goddamn trash can lid wouldn't stay in place. Sure enough, Ashcan Pete still challenged me for it down at the rail yard, but I threw some hot beans in his face and then hopped the 2-25 to Kansas City. Okay, maybe that stuff didn't happen and I've just been hanging out by this Lost and Found kiosk for a while sipping some coffee I swiped from our ring crew. Either way, I'm proud to represent this company as the Golden Egg Champion.
Cut back to the inmate, strapped into an electric chair. He looks lovingly to the chicken strip in his right hand, before the switch is thrown.