Post by Deleted on Mar 20, 2016 23:35:42 GMT
Another static interruption to a Pollo Bucket commercial, cutting to La Cucaracha who is now standing in front of a corkboard, with strings to blank sheets of paper linked to a picture of Cornelius Cobblepot.
La Cucaracha: I think we can all agree that after my last promo, the face of wrestling has changed forever! Pollo Bucket might've asked me to stop threatening fans, but legally, a statement is only considered a threat when leveled at a specific person or group. My conscience is clean, Pollo Bucket, but maybe you need to do some digging on the other members of your roster. Then you'll find out that the stink on Kernal Cobb is more than just fertilizer.
Cornelius Cobblepot, I've been to Cobb County, Georgia and I didn't see any corn fields! What're you hiding?! What really happened that night in Buffalo? Three people dead, corn kernals everywhere and you thought you could just walk away.
The police found your husk at the scene, but you've always had the right connections, Cornelius. Two years later and you're walking free. You might be able to butter up a jury, but this is POLLOMANIA and your sins have finally caught up with you.
When I saw I was booked against you, I made a solemn promise to the Smith family that I'd make you pay for what you did. You might not serve a day in prison, but I guarantee I am going to hit you with not only my signature moves, which will serve to get them over with the Pollomania crowd since this is my second match, but also my finisher, the Hiss of Death, which was already established against Captain Gill Baits and sold as devastating by POLLOMANIA's top notch announce team.
I'm sending you back to Cobb County in a popcorn bag, Cornelius. I'm not just here to hock stylish and affordable merchandise or to win championships or support myself financially. This is about justice. I know a sick cob like you doesn't believe in God, because you choose to make yourself God every time you take another life. Well the body count stops here, Cobblepot!
I have no doubt that losing to me in a wrestling match will end your kill spree for good. All I want is for the victims' families to put their tragedy behind them. Even though they'll never feel whole again. I bet you feel like a real big ear now, don't you?
And don't worry, Cornelius. I'll get to Ursula Areano. If she stops me from pinning you, she'll just prove to the world that not only is she pro-murder, but that she was complicit in your crimes. You'd be surprised how much evidence a few well placed DDTs can dig up.
They say corn always ends up in poop, but your soul has been poop since day one. I'm flushing you for good, Cobblepot. May your victims forever rest in peace.
Fade back to the Pollo Bucket commercial.
La Cucaracha: I think we can all agree that after my last promo, the face of wrestling has changed forever! Pollo Bucket might've asked me to stop threatening fans, but legally, a statement is only considered a threat when leveled at a specific person or group. My conscience is clean, Pollo Bucket, but maybe you need to do some digging on the other members of your roster. Then you'll find out that the stink on Kernal Cobb is more than just fertilizer.
Cornelius Cobblepot, I've been to Cobb County, Georgia and I didn't see any corn fields! What're you hiding?! What really happened that night in Buffalo? Three people dead, corn kernals everywhere and you thought you could just walk away.
The police found your husk at the scene, but you've always had the right connections, Cornelius. Two years later and you're walking free. You might be able to butter up a jury, but this is POLLOMANIA and your sins have finally caught up with you.
When I saw I was booked against you, I made a solemn promise to the Smith family that I'd make you pay for what you did. You might not serve a day in prison, but I guarantee I am going to hit you with not only my signature moves, which will serve to get them over with the Pollomania crowd since this is my second match, but also my finisher, the Hiss of Death, which was already established against Captain Gill Baits and sold as devastating by POLLOMANIA's top notch announce team.
I'm sending you back to Cobb County in a popcorn bag, Cornelius. I'm not just here to hock stylish and affordable merchandise or to win championships or support myself financially. This is about justice. I know a sick cob like you doesn't believe in God, because you choose to make yourself God every time you take another life. Well the body count stops here, Cobblepot!
I have no doubt that losing to me in a wrestling match will end your kill spree for good. All I want is for the victims' families to put their tragedy behind them. Even though they'll never feel whole again. I bet you feel like a real big ear now, don't you?
And don't worry, Cornelius. I'll get to Ursula Areano. If she stops me from pinning you, she'll just prove to the world that not only is she pro-murder, but that she was complicit in your crimes. You'd be surprised how much evidence a few well placed DDTs can dig up.
They say corn always ends up in poop, but your soul has been poop since day one. I'm flushing you for good, Cobblepot. May your victims forever rest in peace.
Fade back to the Pollo Bucket commercial.